For the love. What has it been- a whole six weeks since the last infection? On the upside, I don’t feel entirely like shit like I did the last time. Last time my ability to function was hovering somewhere around 0.25. That is to say my only concern was that my kids were breathing. This time Im quite shocked that I have strep- where’s the wretched fever and chills? Throbbing headache and achiness so bad it hurts to touch my own skin. No, this is just more of your run of the mill feeling like crap. None-the-less, whenever I’m feeling under the weather I’m never setting myself up for success on the parenting front for the day.

I actually thought I felt better today than yesterday so I took Nathan to school, tackled some projects around here while Mackenzie napped, went into work, got the mail, ran to a store out in town and then asked PC if he wanted to pick Nathan up from school so we could all meet for lunch. So he did. Im not sure what kid he picked up, but other than the fact that he answered to the name “Nathan” I wasn’t sure he was ours. He was nothing like the happy kid I dropped off this morning. You might as well have told him the world was ending because thats how he reacted to the fact that we weren’t having chicken nuggets for lunch. Everything went downhill from there. PC left to go back to work, Nathan went barreling out the door after him. I figured he was just out on our sidewalk until two (count them TWO) neighbors came over to tell me my kid was wandering down the street. I leave Mackenzie playing on the floor, run outside after Nathan where he proceeds to throw a fit and I carry him (all 47lbs and what 48″? of him) and he’s kicking and thrashing the whole way. I get back to the house where I find my daughter about to escape through the front door. And then, because things weren’t going swimmingly enough Nathan proceeds to kick his sister and then intentionally pushed the baby gate over on top of her. If I wasn’t mad before, that sent me over the edge. My throat hurts to talk, so yelling was really fun but we had some words before I sent Nathan to his room. He, screaming and slobbering all over the stairs told me he wasn’t going up. I picked up the screaming baby and told him he better get to his room NOW because I was so angry with him that I was ready to slap him. No, wait, the parent acting inappropriately?- it gets better.

I walked away to collect myself, call PC and let him know that the situation is continuing to escalate, so today would *not* be a good day to work late. Mackenzie went down for her afternoon nap, the clinic called to let me know that yes, in fact the strep test was positive but, the dr. was sort of busy so he probably wouldn’t get around to putting in the Rx until just before the pharmacy closes. Thanks beyotch.

Once Mackenzie woke up there was some fighting over a bottle of water. You know- those little Nursery water bottles of water? Oh right, you probably don’t feed those to your kids because you have fluoride in your water. My kids drink Nursery water and Nathan gets a little bottle in his lunch. Nathan, because he was being such a great big brother today decided to tease her every which way so finally I just went and got another bottle for her. Then he was upset because hers was newer. Same bottle. Same size. One slightly newer. So he goes and helps himself to another bottle and was about to open the cap when I snatched it. I explained to him that we already waste enough of these as it is. He was going to finish the first bottle before he had a second. He proceeds to act like a little stink, so I put the new bottle far back on the counter. He goes in, gets the step ladder, and in an act of pure defiance opens the bottle pulls up the top and takes a sip. I grab it from him, tip it over and squirt the entire thing on his head. Yep- and here I am admitting it to the entire internet. Im sure my mother is cringing a little.

I had officially reached the end of my rope. It was a bad afternoon and the fact that I felt like crap just made everything worse. Am I proud of the way I acted? No. Regrettable? Yes. Did I walk into the kitchen and start laughing after I did it? Absolutely. PC asked what the straw breaking the camels back was and I think that was it. When things start to get too dicey around here I tend to pull the EJECT lever and get us the hell out of the house. I don’t care where we go- we can just go put gas in the car, but the bottom line is must. exit. house. now. So we went to the shopette in search of slushies and a movie. We got to the counter and both Nathan and I set down our grape slushies. And, this was the one damn time he didn’t chew the straw up and I had no idea whose was whose. On a day that I didn’t have colony of bacteria residing in the back of my throat this wouldn’t be a big deal. Mackenzie is flinging herself forward in a futile effort to be put down so she can crawl. Hot, sweaty (fever?) and annoyed; I ask the lady if she can please just charge me for a THIRD DAMN SLURPEE so I can go get a fresh, uninfected one and leave. Deep breath.

I drove home, left the kids in front of the house in the car and called the pharmacy to see if the Rx was in. It was, so we headed to the clinic, waited the standard 30 minutes and headed home. By this time it was 4:30 and I was ready to feed these dudes and put them to bed. On days like today meals go to the lowest common denominator and since we had subway for lunch we ended up with breakfast for dinner.

A quick search landed us on this recipe and ho, it. was. good. I mean, you know its going to be a good waffle when the butter in the batter starts sizzling out and pools on the side of the waffle iron. And normally we don’t eat like this. Normally I’d modify the fat content in a recipe like this. But today? Today I said: Only 6 Tablespoons of butter? Why not make it a whole STICK. Because thats the kind of DAY ITS BEEN.

Filed under: Is it strep? Yep., This Is My Life, someday you'll look back at this and laugh...someday